It’s not uncommon for people to have a list of favourite baby names on their phones, but liking a name doesn’t always mean it’s the right choice for your child. T
his sentiment is echoed by many Reddit users who reacted to a couple’s decision to name their son John Doe.
The father has a deep personal attachment to the name John and insists on using it, despite its widespread use as a generic placeholder for an unidentified or anonymous person in legal contexts in both the UK and US.
The father shared his story on Reddit: “I wish I was kidding. It’s insanely important to me that I name one of my sons John. I do not want to get too deep into the reason why, since the situation is very personal and sentimental to me, but if you knew the story you would absolutely understand.
“My wife and I have been married for three years and she is currently pregnant and we are expecting a baby within the next four months or so. The name John also has some significance to her, due to it being a family name.”
However, upon marrying his wife, he chose to take her last name, Doe, without initially considering the implications for his future children’s names. He explained: “I was never in a hurry to have children so the fact that if I wanted to have a child named John I’d have to name him John Doe, didn’t really occur to me until the moment she got pregnant.”
Initially overjoyed at the prospect of parenthood, the expectant father soon found himself entangled in a disagreement over his child’s name. His enthusiasm was tempered when discussions about naming his child began, revealing potential issues.
While his wife likes the name, many have cautioned him against it, suggesting it could lead to lifelong challenges for their child. He shared: “My wife doesn’t mind the name, she says some people may say something about it, but she overall likes the sound of it.”
Conducting extensive research only deepened his concern, as numerous opinions online likened choosing the name John Doe to being cruel. The more he pondered, the more he started to agree with this perspective.
Seeking advice, he pondered alternatives: “What do I do? What I was thinking is that we give him a middle name and he rather goes by that publicly instead, but once again, the name John is important to me and I would’ve really liked to have been able to call my child that.”
He continued to grapple with the issue, noting: “It also still makes him stuck with the ‘John Doe’ name, regardless of whatever the middle name is. I was even thinking of making his name Johnathan Doe, and then letting him go by Nathan, but my wife and I both hate that nickname and also it still wouldn’t allow him to escape from the ‘John Doe’ name anyway.”
Discussing potential solutions to the dilemma, one participant suggested a compromise: “You could hyphenate the surnames. I know you took Doe already but you could make it [previous surname]-Doe, potentially.”
Meanwhile, another user urged reconsideration of choosing a widely recognised placeholder name for their child: “I really wouldn’t name your child John Doe. Can you use it as a second name? Can you find other version of John, like Jack or from another language depending on your background and taste? Such as Jean in French is John.”