A man has divided opinion after insisting his entire family – not to mention everyone he encounters in his general day to day – are pronouncing his very traditional name wrong.
A name is an integral part of our identity and, whether it’s morally correct or not, they often lead to snap judgements and preconceived notions. It’s important our names are reflective of how we self-identify.
For one man, named Stephen, the way his family pronounces his name has proved to be a bone of contention. He insists it should be pronounced as ‘Stefan’, not ‘Steven’ and cited the name Stephanie as an example to support his argument.
His wife, who can see both sides of the pronunciation debate, took to Reddit to seek the advice of strangers. She penned: “My husband’s name is Stephen. His mother and entire family know him as such, and they pronounce it like ‘Steven’, but when we met he introduced himself with the pronunciation like Stephen Curry or ‘Steph’.
“I was with my [sister-in-law] and nieces/nephews the other day and said to my nephew that his ‘Uncle Steph’ would be happy with something, then realised afterward that they all know him as ‘Uncle Steve’ and that’s why I got some confused looks.”
She explained her husband “hates” being called Steve and “genuinely wishes” his whole family would “say it correctly”. His wife said Stephen’s arguments are: “1) in the English language, a ‘ph’ makes an ‘f’ sound (i.e. phone), and 2) the name Stephenie/Stephanie is pronounced with the ‘f’ sound and not a ‘v’ and it’s the exact same name/spelling besides the extra two letters at the end.”
She was “curious” to hear others’ opinions as she can see both perspectives. One person said: “Steph Curry is the only person in the world I’ve heard with that pronunciation. Steven and Stephen are both Stee-Ven. If your husband were Stefan, then he’s got a point.”
Another said: “Every Stephen I know pronounces it Steven. It’s only the other way if it’s Stefan. Also, your parents named him, so I would argue they are pronouncing it correctly. Your husband can change his name, but that’s a change, which doesn’t mean his parents were wrong in the first place.”
A third shared: “My aunt spelled my cousin’s name as Stephan but had to change it to Stefan because people were pronouncing it Steven.”
Someone else advised: “I think if he approached [it] as, ‘I’d prefer to be called…’ rather than ‘Your pronunciation is wrong’ that could really help. I mean, telling his parents they are wrong is kinda off, since they named him.”
His wife replied: “Totally fair point! I’m not sure how it was originally approached, I just know it’s been addressed a couple times and hasn’t been ‘respected’ so that’s where the frustration now comes from. The discussion two years ago did include ‘I would prefer’ after some frustrated discussion, which led to them actually saying it the way he prefers for a day or two, but it just reverted right back and he gave up pushing for it again.”