A devastated mum has spoken out about losing her teenage daughter to cancer after being dismissed by a GP for months. Rebecca Elizabeth Gaskell, from Buckinghamshire, never expected such a terrible outcome when her 12-year-old daughter Grace’s fingers began tingling.
She was dismissed by the GP, who blamed her symptoms on hormonal silent migraines. Grace then started to develop more serious problems and her mother realised that there must be something more sinister at work. “Grace’s first symptoms were tingling in her fingers on her left hand,” Rebecca remembers. “She had just gone back to school after half term holiday and I honestly thought it was due to writing too much.
“She then started to get a kaleidoscope effect in her left eye. I took her to the GP but they were useless. After that Grace had a burning sensation down her left arm and on one occasion it was so bad we had to call an ambulance. They refused to come out saying that our GP had stated Grace was having hormonal silent migraines. I took Grace to A&E several times which led to nothing.”
Rebecca, an ex-paediatric nurse who now works as a group exercise instructor, started doing her own research. “After about two months of no help from the GP I realised it was probably a tumour,” she recalls. “One Sunday Grace’s symptoms got particularly bad and we called an ambulance again, which thankfully came out.
“She ended up having a full seizure and had a CT scan. But they said they couldn’t see a mass despite it being clear to see. Grace was in hospital being treated for everything but a brain tumour for six weeks and the doctors wouldn’t listen to me. After being discharged I emailed all the paediatric neurologists at John Radcliffe Hospital and thankfully one replied.
“He asked me to bring her in for a 24 hour EEG and video assessment.”
An EEG (electroencephalogram) measures the electrical activity of the brain. As soon as the test started, the monitor showed that Grace’s brain was in a state of continuous, abnormal brainwave activity. “Twenty four hours later the neurologist asked me what I thought Grace might have,” Rebecca recalls. “I said a brain tumour and he confirmed I was right.
“I felt sick to my stomach that I had finally been listened to and so angry that it took so long. Grace was then transferred to Bristol hospital for a biopsy which confirmed an anaplastic astrocytoma grade 3 with GBM grade 4 markers. By the time she was diagnosed the tumour was so big it was inoperable and she was terminal.”
Grace initially had six weeks of radiotherapy followed by 12 months of chemo. “The radiotherapy went very well and actually to everyone’s surprise it left the tumour dormant for just over a year,” Rebecca says. “Grace got through her initial treatment very well. She lost her hair and had to miss a lot of school, air cadets and judo but she went as often as she could.
“She often felt sick and very tired but she was always happy and positive.”
Grace died aged just 14.
“Losing a child is not something you get through,” Rebecca adds. “You have no choice but to live with it day by day. Sometimes it’s hard to remember life before cancer. It seems like a lifetime away or someone else’s life. Before the diagnosis, life was just simple, fun and every day. We took life for granted and never ever thought anything like this would or could happen to us. Grace had just started at senior school and absolutely loved it.
“She had made good friends and started street dance classes and life was good.”
The family has struggled to come to terms with the tragedy that overwhelmed them. But the memory of Grace has kept them going. “Our daughter was an absolute inspiration”, Rebecca says. “When she was diagnosed aged 12 she wrote that she wanted to show others how to live a good life with cancer.
“She inspired people all over the world with her positivity. She passed away aged 14 in November 2020 and continues to inspire others every day.”
Determined to raise awareness of brain tumours, Rebecca joined the Angel Mums group, and together they worked on setting up a fundraiser together. The mums, who have all lost children to brain tumours, came together to form a support group.
They raise funds for the Tessa Jowell Foundation which is committed to funding and supporting the transformation of brain cancer treatment and care in the UK. So far they have raised over £60,000, with a target of £100,000. The group were one of the winners at the most recent JustGiving Awards.
“I joined the Angel Mums group after we all discussed we wanted to do a fundraiser and the group was then set up,” Rebecca explains. “The Angel Mums is an amazing support for mums, dads and siblings. We lift each other on our darkest days and understand and support. I’m so glad I’ve met them.”
As well as raising money for this vital cause, Rebecca also wants to raise awareness of the symptoms of brain tumours. “I wish more people knew that brain tumours are not rare,” she explains. “I’m fed up with the media and doctors saying they are rare. They are not.
“My husband had two brain tumours in his family and my uncle was diagnosed with one in January 2024 so we have two as well including Grace. People also need to know that initial symptoms aren’t just headaches and sickness. Grace’s first symptoms were sensory seizures.
“Never take anything for granted: tomorrow is promised to no one.”
You can donate to the Angel Mums’ fundraiser for the Tessa Jowell Foundation with Just Giving here Angel Mums Earth, Wind & Fire Fundraiser Challenge 2024 for the Tessa Jowell Foundation: https://www.justgiving.com/page/angelmums2024