This result? Who foresaw it? What a mess and, well, Zebre did it and deservedly so beating Ulster for the first time in Belfast and potentially derailing the province’s hopes for top eight rugby in the URC.
Humiliating? Absolutely but the Italians deserved everything that came their way ending a truly dire record away from home and this with effectively their second string.
Ulster were a shadow, struggling to get to the pace of the game and then losing their way. They looked sluggish and, frankly, shambolic on what must be the most embarrassing result they may ever have shipped in front of their own supporters at Ravenhill.
What now for Richie Murphy and his side? Who knows but this was theoretically a bonus point victory and instead ended up in the wreckage of defeat.
A Sunday evening game on another utterly filthy day of weather, it just wasn’t a great look no matter what way you came at it but that was nothing compared to what unfolded.
Even the curtain-raiser, the first Schools’ Cup last 16 clash to be showcased at Ravenhill, which brought Banbridge Academy and Sullivan Upper together was hugely challenging for both due to the swirling wind and rain driving across the pitch.
Not exactly the sort of evening John Cooney would have chosen for his 150th UIster game but then that’s the rub of it and to see him run out at Ravenhill, ahead of his teammates, was special particularly as the word is that he’s probably on his travels at season’s end.
More importantly, though, getting a result was what was primary to revive Ulster’s URC campaign and propel them towards the play-offs and, boy, how they failed in this regard, Cooney even being hauled ashore early doors.
And with this being the final fixture ahead of the Six Nations period – after Zebre, Ulster play just four more times before the end of March – it was utterly vital that Richie Murphy and his squad signed off with a sense of momentum ahead of their next competitive outing at Benetton on February 15.
And then all that crashed and burned.
The general idea was to get things moving early doors, but the opening exchanges were hardly ideal for the home team, Kieran Treadwell making an error from the kick-off, with some early indiscipline pinning them back into their 22.
Just on 11 minutes and after some good continuity with Scott Wilson and Lorcan McLoughlin showing up well, Ulster won a kickable penalty and went for the corner though Jack Murphy’s shot went dead killing stone dead their chance at going for the line.
Still, Ulster kept up the pressure, a nice half-break from Cooney nearly leading to something though another penalty did come the home team’s way which, this time, Murphy put to the corner with accuracy.
From that opportunity, Ulster attempted to maul via Tom Stewart only for the ball to be moved right and after Wilson’s strong drive it looked inevitable that a try was coming with the home team encamped on the line.
However, Zebre turned them over and hacked downfield to lift the siege which, in turn, allowed Zac Ward a run and link up with Cooney though the move broke down.
With 20 minutes gone, though, there was still no score which was certainly a case of advantage Zebre which was certainly the case again when Wilson was penalised at a 24th minute breakdown and, shortly afterwards, the hosts conceded another penalty from a driving maul with Eric O’Sullivan coming in offside.
However, Giacomo Da Re’s aim for the corner was also off target and though the Italians came again, Gonzalo Garcia’s pass was forward to a supporting player as they attacked Ulster’s defence off the side of a ruck.
Then, on 27 minutes, Zebre’s already impressive scrum led to a penalty on Ulster’s put-in. The result was Giovanni Montemauri asking for the tee and nailing the kick.
Bautista Stavile was yellow carded on 32 minutes following a hit on O’Sullivan and after Ulster went for the corner and threw to David McCann, Tom Stewart broke blind but his burst to the line was stopped as Garcia hammered the hooker into touch.
Ulster’s profligacy with the ball continued with Nick Timoney not able to hold a pass and then a link up with McLoughlin also failed to find the skipper.
Zebre finished the half strongly with Leonard Krumov’s lineout bust nearly leading to a potential score only for Timoney to secure a vital jackal penalty near his own line.
A half of dire stuff ended appropriately when Stewart opted to kick the ball and that was that for the first 40 minutes.
Ulster now needed to take control and fast and at least the weather had improved somewhat as the teams came returned with Zebre quickly back up to full complement meaning the hosts had failed to register anything during the sin-binning.
It was hardly an ideal start with Michael Lowry knocking on in an early attack.
Alessandro Gesi’s break then shredded Ulster’s defence with only a spill preventing another possible breakthrough for the visitors.
But shortly afterwards, on 46 minutes, Zebre moved the ball left and right, Garcia supplying Stavile with a scoring pass to make the line. Montemauri missed the difficult extras.
And it got worse. Giovani Licata’s burst led to a penalty and in a flash Zebre were away through Garcia whose quick pass to Giacomo Da Re on an angle saw the full-back sweep through to score. Montemauri converted to make it 15-0.
Now Ulster just had to respond and eventually did, barrelling away at the line before Corrie Barrett crashed over on 56 minutes, Nathan Doak converting to get them going.
Ulster then had a let off as Montemauri was wide with a penalty though the sight of Doak miskicking straight into touch brought no comfort to the home team.
With eight minutes on the clock, Ulster won a penalty and went for goal though Doak was well wide with what looked a must-nail effort.
A rare error from Da Re allowed Ulster another window and this time they took it when Barrett was driven over for his second, Doak again converting to cut Zebre’s lead to a point but with four minutes remaining.
But there was no further reprieve for Ulster and Zebre hung on to deservedly win.
Ulster: S Moore, M Lowry, B Carson, J Postlethwaite, Z Ward, J Murphy, J Cooney, E O’Sullivan, T Stewart, S Wilson, H Sheridan, K Treadwell, L McLoughlin, N Timoney (CAPT), D McCann.
Replacements: J Andrew for Stewart 53mins, C Reid for O’Sullivan 51mins, C Barrett for Wilson 45mins, A O’Connor for Treadwell 47mins, Matty Rea for McLoughlin 65mins, N Doak for Cooney 49mins, J Flannery for Murphy 58mins, R Lyttle for Ward 69mins.
Zebre Parma: G Da Re, A Gesi, F Paea, D Mazza, S Gregory, G Montemauri, G Garcia, P Buonfiglio, L Bigi (CAPT), M Hasa, M Canali, L Krumov, R Nasove, B Stavile, G Licata.
Replacements: G Quattrini for Bigi mins, L Franceschetto for Hasa 73mins, J Pitinari for Buonfiglio 46mins, G Ferrari for Nasove 56mins, L Andreani for Canali 69mins, T Dominguez for mins, L Morisi for Mazza 76 mins, S Brisighella for Gregory 69mins.
Yellow card: B Stavile 32-42mins
Referee: B Breakspear (WRU)
But Doak missed and now Ulster need to scores in just over five minutes