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With the New Year upon us, it’s time to reflect on everything we’ve learned and the growth we’ve experienced in the last 12 months. In 2024, we navigated evolving dating trends like “future faking” and “snowglobing” while redefining aging, intimacy, and vulnerability.
As a sex columnist, I’ve had the privilege of interviewing a plethora of knowledgeable sex and relationship experts. These are a few of my favourite words of wisdom from the past twelve months. Whether you’re hoping to fall in love, strengthen your connection with your partner, or develop a better relationship with yourself, I hope these insights inspire and guide you toward a happy and fulfilling 2025.
Continue to be curious about your partner.
When we first meet and fall in love with our partner, we’re like tourists – curious about everything. Eventually, though, we get to know them so well that we become the tour guide. When this happens, it’s easy to make assumptions about your partner. Sex educator and relationship expert, Shan Boodram, urges couples to stay curious about their beloved. “We need to give each other blank pages to be unexpected, to be surprising. That’s going to keep us interested in the relationship first and foremost. It’s going to give that other person space to breathe and still feel like they have autonomy,” says Boodram.
Learn to fight more productively.
Staying curious about your partner can also help resolve conflict. Lisa Brateman, LCSW, author of the new book, What Are We Really Fighting About?: How to Transform Conflicts into Conversations encourages couples to stay curious even when fighting. “Sometimes couples truly don’t know what’s behind one another’s anger because they never asked before,” she says.
Brateman says that anger is often used to protect ourselves. “It masks feelings of shame, anxiety, and loss which would expose your vulnerability as well.” Instead, she encourages couples to be vulnerable with each other and sharpen their listening skills. She notes, “How can you resolve an issue when you usually hear aggression and not the pain of what is being said?”
Ditch toxic masculinity and embrace vulnerability instead.
Currently, there are a lot of mixed messages about what it means to be a man. But Todd Baratz, a psychotherapist specializing in relationships and sexuality, says that embracing vulnerability can also help men better navigate dating in this changing landscape. This starts by unlearning outdated toxic values, like the idea that men must suppress emotion, assert dominance, and use violence to prove their masculinity. Instead, Baratz encourages men to honour their interiority and communicate it to their partners. He says, “Openness about feelings, experiencing emotions, empathy, and emotional connectedness are important for all genders and don’t have to come at the expense of independence or assertiveness.”
Plan money dates.
“When partners have different financial values and habits, it’s like navigating two ships heading in different directions,” says Naomi Strong, a finance expert and writer at jamesastrong.com. Getting on the same page starts with ongoing, open, non-judgmental conversations about each other’s money mindsets.
Krystal Walter, founder of Krystal Walter Matchmaking, suggests couples make it a habit to have ‘money dates’ to discuss their financial goals and progress. Life is busy and having uninterrupted time to discuss money is key. “Especially during stressful times, finding a relaxed, neutral setting like a cozy coffee shop can work wonders. It’s amazing how a change of scenery can lighten the mood and make tough conversations feel more manageable,” says Strong.
It’s never too late for a fresh start.
In 2024, the term “grey divorce” gained traction. If you’re getting divorced in mid-life (or older) and are distraught and disoriented, know that your feelings are valid.
Niloufar Esmaeilpour, Founder and Clinical Director of Lotus Therapy & Counselling Centre encourages people to seek professional counselling and not rush the healing process. When redefining yourself post-divorce, Esmaeilpour says, “Focus on self-care and rediscovery of activities and interests that bring happiness and fulfillment.”
If we take anything into 2025, let it be a more positive view of aging and everything it entails – including divorce. While challenging, getting older is a chance for reinvention. “Individuals might discover inner potentials never realized before, thereby giving birth to fresh exciting episodes in life,” says Dr. Michelle Dees, a Board-Certified Psychiatrist at Luxury Psychiatry Medical Spa.
Whether you’re going through a breakup, navigating the dating scene, or building a better relationship with your partner, just remember: what feels like the end of the world might be a new beginning.