There is a sign up in our kitchen which reads: “Democracy is where any two idiots can outvote a genius.” It’s there to remind us that democracy sometimes gets it wrong.
And when it does, it’s the devil to undo. Hitler used democratic means to take absolute power in 1934 by holding a referendum on merging the posts of chancellor and president.
It took a world war to put that right and make Germany a proper democracy again.
Westerners assume that democracy is so good everyone would want it given the chance. This is not the case. Take China, for instance.
The Chinese not only dislike democracy but think it’s a disaster as political systems go because voting causes instability and uncertainty.
And for evidence they point to the Capitol Hill riots following the 2020 US election and Brexit.
It’s why Chinese leaders put the boot into democracy movements in Hong Kong and cosy up to other autocracies such as North Korea, Iran and Russia.
Western democracy prioritises the individual. To the Chinese Communist Party it’s the masses who matter. The motto of the CCP is: “Good government gives the most people the best options.” It might have added that as a result it’s not too fussed about individual human rights
The masses broadly go along with this because GDP per capita went up from £240 to £9,500 in 35 years.
Which means we are not going to see a petition in China calling for a General Election. At the time of writing ours was heading towards three million signatures with 90 people joining every minute.
GB News viewers and listeners took me to task for saying I thought this might be a massive practical joke, though I’m sure some signatories are genuinely angry with Keir Starmer’s government.
Yet they must know this petition is going nowhere.
I also got some flak for noting that people from all over the world have signed up from places including Russia, China, Iran and Iraq suggesting they are not taking this entirely seriously either.
Even some in the Antarctic got in on the act. Perhaps the penguins also have a sense of humour.
Viewer @BlodynCarol demanded I produce evidence for this foreign participation. You’ll find it, Carol, if you click on the line at the bottom of the petition which says ‘get petition data’.
The reason I suspect the motives of some of those who have jumped on the ballot box bandwagon is because Brits like nothing more than having a communal laugh.
When people were asked for their religion in the 2001 national census 390,000 put ‘Jedi’ after the pointy-eared puppet in the Star Wars movies.
Had that been allowed to stand it would mean Jedis officially outnumbered Sikhs and Jews. The registrar-general Len Cook wisely reclassified them under the heading of no religion.
LATEST OPINION FROM MEMBERSHIP:
Health Secretary Wes Streeting has asked people to write in with suggestions for his 10 year NHS reform plan.
To date they have included firing Wes out of a cannon to raise funds, replacing him with a dog, installing a Weatherpoons in every hospital and putting Daleks on the nursing staff because they have extensive experience with doctors.
And when the public was asked to name a new British polar research vessel they overwhelmingly chose Boaty McBoatface.
The science minister overruled this exercise in online democracy and called her the Sir David Attenborough instead.
On the Farage show the Reform Party’s former top spin doctor Gawain Towler quipped that if I was right this petition should henceforth be known as Votey McVoteface.
Even though signing will not make a jot of difference to the date of the next election, I am nevertheless pleased the petition will be debated in the House of Commons overflow chamber, Westminster Hall, anyway.
Those who signed it in all sincerity deserve that, and the jokers will get their punchline. Opposition MPs don’t get much to do nowadays and this will be a chance to spend an agreeable afternoon having a whinge.
At least this petition got further than some Parliament receives, and the X bot @rejectpetitions collects the ones thrown in the bin.
A petitioner fed up with seagulls nicking holiday makers’ chips wanted MPs to debate a proposal to “form an agency to be known as the Anti-Seagull League to hunt and kill seagulls.”
It was rejected with the reply: “We understand that you’re concerned about seagulls, but we’re not sure exactly what you’d like the Government or Parliament to do.”
Here’s an idea then. Defence Secretary John Healey is scrapping the army’s fleet of 47 Watchkeeper drones.
Instead of sending them to the junkyard, they could be repurposed for a spot of aerial combat down by the seaside.