A neuroscientist has shared a life hack she says everyone should use when talking to someone – especially if they are on a date. In an episode of Steven Bartlett’s Diary of a CEO podcast show, brain expert Dr Tara Swart discussed how powerful the mind can truly be.
Dr Swart is a neuroscientist and medical doctor who is a senior lecturer at MIT Sloan. She wrote the book ‘ The Source: Open Your Mind, Change Your Life ‘ and ‘ The Secrets of the Universe, the Science of the Brain’. The expert hosts the podcast Reinvent Yourself.
She wowed Steven and viewers by explaining the importance of keeping eye contact – particularly looking into someone’s left eye during a conversation. She says this can boost a natural bonding response in the brain and create a stronger, emotional connection with the person.
The doctor said the left eye trick stems back to when we were babies. Dr Swart began her explanation by highlighting that when a baby is born, one of the primary ways it learns about emotions is through eye contact with its mother.
She further explains that since most people are right-handed, they tend to hold their babies with their left hand, keeping their dominant hand free. As a result, when they look into their child’s eyes, it’s typically their right eye meeting the left eye of the baby.
According to her, these early interactions significantly influence the amygdala, the brain region responsible for processing emotions, establishing what she calls an ’emotional resonance loop.’ She said: “So, most people are right handed so they’ll be holding their baby in their left arm so they can use their dominant hand to do stuff.
“So when you gaze at your baby, your right eye is looking at their left eye, and then as that interaction from the optic nerve is going around the brain, it’s impacting the amygdala where emotions come from. It’s creating this emotional resonance loop that’s part of how the mother and baby bond so that right eye to left eye contact is the most bonding eye contact you can have with someone.”
She added: “If I’m trying to build a bond with someone that’s the statistically most likely one to create good resonance between you.” Bartlett later asked if she had been looking into his left eye during the interview.
She laughed and then explained how sharing a hug and a few jokes before sitting down together helped lower his guard subconsciously and begin a bonding process. Other body language tips Dr Swart shared included using physical actions, like handshakes, hugs, and kisses on the cheek, which can help generate a sense of friendship and trust.