A man from Northern Ireland has opened up about a romance scam that “almost destroyed his life”.
The man, who has chosen to remain anonymous, was deceived by a fraudster into giving more than £200,000 in a romance scam.
“This entire experience has had a devastating impact on my whole life, both financially and emotionally. I felt ashamed that I had let myself fall victim to this fraud,” he explained.
The man was scammed over a two-year period between 2020 and 2022.
Having met the scammer online through a dating site, the man came to believe he was in a genuine relationship with a woman he went on to trust.
After intense contact, initially via the dating app, their communication eventually moved off-app into private messaging.
The man then began to receive requests for money for a variety of scenarios.
On one occasion the woman told him that she had a very wealthy grandmother, but that she needed to borrow thousands of pounds for legal fees relating to her will.
When the man was reluctant to send the money, the woman pressured him into complying with the request.
On another occasion, she told the man that she had been in a car crash, and again needed money from him to help pay her medical bills.
“The people behind this fraud … almost destroyed my life,” he said.
They spoke on the phone a few times, but he never met the person face-to-face and was given different excuses each time as to why not.
At one point the woman sent him a link to what police believe to be a fake online banking webpage in order to prove she had money to repay him.
“I have always had the attitude if I can help people I will but, unfortunately, in this instance I was taken advantage of,” the man said.
As a result the man said he lost more than £200,000 – everything he had – and he found himself under severe strain and in debt.
It was at this point that the man reported the scamming to the PSNI and the man eventually was able to recover the money.
A NI man has opened up about losing £200k in a romance scam. Credit: Getty Images
Ahead of Valentine’s Day, the PSNI are urging people to be aware of the signs of romance fraud.
Chair of ScamwiseNI Partnership, Superintendent Joanne Gibson said: “Many people use social media and dating sites to find love and meet new people and, while in many cases, situations are safe and legitimate, there are, unfortunately, criminals who take advantage of this and go to great lengths to build a fake relationship. Their sole aim is stealing people’s money.”
Figures show between 1st January and 31st December 2024, there were 127 romance scams reported to the police with a total reported loss of £1,083,007.
Individual reported losses ranged from hundreds of pounds to more than £100,000.
“Fraudsters seek to build a relationship of trust quickly before requesting money,” added Superintendent Gibson.
“Initially, they’ll appear charming and come across as being really interested in you, but they’ll have multiple excuses for not being able to meet face-to-face.
“They’ll hint at financial troubles and starting asking for money to help them sort out their problems by playing on their emotions.
“For example, pay for medical or legal bills, help a family member or to help pay for travel, or some sort of investment opportunity. They’ll promise to repay the money but, have no intention of doing so.”
Superintendent Gibson added that it’s important that people are aware of how to keep themselves and their money safe from scammers who can strike at any time of the year.
“For some people who believe they’ve found a genuine, meaningful relationship, the stark reality is they’ve been emotionally and financially drained. “Even if any money lost is recovered, the person is still left to cope with the emotional impact and distress. It’s devastating and is such a cruel form of deception.”
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