That’s no cabinet. It’s a Palace Guard for a leader on his way to the getaway limo.

The ministers appointed Friday are the hard knot of the remaining Justin Trudeau loyalists, but even they looked like they were gagging on expressions of eternal loyalty to the prime minister.

The change many Albertans were hoping for — the exit of Environment Minister Steven Guilbeault — did not happen.

As the ministers were being sworn in, dump-Trudeau MPs were sounding off in TV interviews. The prime minister is surrounded even inside the palace walls.

Some CBC commentators actually treated these cabinet changes as hopeful signs of renewed government. For the gritty real thing you have to watch French CBC. These people take no prisoners.

One of the best moments came when a reporter asked the new Official Languages Minister, Rachel Bendaya, if the French language is declining in Quebec. The stunned minister had no idea what to say in any language.

Great hair, though. As a group, these ministers of all genders stood out for their elegant and expensive winter coats, superb grooming, Grade A coiffures and excellent dental work.

Justin Trudeau cabinet shuffle
Gov. Gen. Mary Simon, left, and Prime Minister Justin Trudeau look over at appointed ministers including Public Safety Minister David McGuinty, centre, during a cabinet swearing-in ceremony at Rideau Hall in Ottawa, on Friday, Dec. 20, 2024.Sean Kilpatrick/The Canadian Press

I found the effect nauseating. The display of easy affluence is so offside with a general public struggling with inflation, rent, housing and life in general. Few people could fail to see elite politicians simply delighted by their sudden ascent to power.

Speaking of elites, NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh emerged from the Maserati SUV, or perhaps the aircraft first-class pod, to say he would introduce a no-confidence motion in the government.

Singh has already said Trudeau must resign and the government is done. His promise of a no-confidence motion makes an early election inevitable, although he was typically oblique about timing.

He said the NDP motion would come “in the new sitting of the House of Commons” — not at the first possible opportunity.

Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre was not oblique. He said he’ll ask the Governor General to recall Parliament for an immediate no-confidence vote. This dart was aimed at the ever-equivocal Singh as well as Trudeau.

Through all this, Trudeau himself didn’t speak a word to the general public until he spoke briefly Friday about public security and U.S. president-elect Donald Trump.

Earlier, he looked to fellow elitists for love and affection. After Finance Minister Chrystia Freeland resigned, he spoke to a gathering of the Liberals’ storied Laurier Club.

Hilariously, he thanked the powerhouse Liberal donors for getting out and campaigning, knocking on doors and all that.

These people do not knock on doors; they buy doors that happen to be installed in mansions. But if they stop giving to the party, Trudeau is further doomed.

The PM’s next stop was a Christmas Party for Liberal political staffers. They cheered him wildly for the obvious reason that their jobs depend on his goodwill.

The prime minister appeared choked up and repeated his vows of affection and love. There was no projection of toughness here, just a deep neediness.

Justin Trudeau cabinet shuffle
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau participates in a cabinet swearing-in ceremony at Rideau Hall on December 20, 2024, in Ottawa, Canada.Dave Chan/AFP

It’s pretty clear after all these years, even to fans of Trudeau, that he requires attention, affection and applause.

I remember an event early in his reign at Kananaskis Country in the Rockies. He was there for a cabinet retreat. Guests in the hotel heard he was coming and gathered in the lobby.

Trudeau appeared, glowing with celebrity, and did selfies with an adoring round of parents and teenagers. This went on until he’d grinned into the last available device.

It slowly dawned on me that the whole scene had been carefully set by his staff.

Today, he isn’t going to get affection from the public or even his own caucus. So he returns to the party wellspring like a wounded wildebeest seeking the oasis.

This would be very sad if the damage to the country were not so real and severe.

I knew his father, Pierre, and suffered serial insults at his hands for bizarre reasons I might reveal in my last column in this business.

But Pierre was tough as old rock, undeniably and admirably so. That may explain a lot about the son, as he edges ever closer to the exit.

Don Braid’s column appears regularly in the Herald

X: @DonBraid