As I go about my day-to-day life, I look around me and see so many people looking down at their phones. Whether it’s someone on the train, a parent pushing a pushchair, people waiting at bus stops, young people walking to school, or people in coffee shops,… very few seem present or living “in the now”.
Walking into a supermarket there is one checkout with someone on it, all the rest are self-checkouts, even some of the clothes shops now have machines that decipher how much you have spent and take your money after you have had to take the security tags of yourself, all without engaging with you.
The lasting effects of social isolation, segregation and social distancing coupled with technology advancing have left the world with a loneliness pandemic fuelled by its own scientific and societal progression.
I recently asked my followers on Instagram if they felt lonely, all the time, some of the time or never. These were the results… 26 per cent said they felt lonely all the time, 64 per cent said some of the time and only 10 per cent said never. It’s clear to me that loneliness is fast becoming a new pandemic: and we must start taking it more seriously.
Most, if not all of us, can feel lonely at times, after all, it is a natural human emotion – we as humans are biologically wired to need social contact with others.
Feeling lonely can be an indication that we need more of this. Our experiences of emotions are personal and unique to each individual, and the feelings of loneliness are no different.
Having lots of friends and contacts in your life does not necessarily mean that you will not feel lonely, for many people, loneliness can be linked to their lack of belief in themselves or low self-esteem.
Prolonged and or intense periods of loneliness can have a negative impact on both our mental and physical health, affecting our sleep patterns, diet and exercise which can lead to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.
Many people are quick to blame social media for social isolation and loneliness, whilst I can agree with this to a certain point, I also see how if used correctly it can help to connect people in a positive way so leaving them feeling less isolated and part of something.
If you are experiencing loneliness, here are some ways to try and alleviate it.
A good place to start is by working out what self-care and awareness of being lonely means to you. Some people who live on their own find it comforting to have some background noise, a television radio or even a podcast.
Go for a walk, doing arts and crafts, cooking a meal from scratch, or just watching a programme or reading a book you enjoy are all good places to start finding peace with yourself.
Feeling lonely can be a scary thought to share with other people, but it is important to reach out to someone you trust, you may find that they have experienced similar feelings themselves. Being able to normalise feelings of loneliness with someone that you trust may help you to feel better.
If you have felt lonely for a long period of time, it will be daunting opening up and meeting new people, so please don’t rush and take small steps at a level you can cope with.
Starting with smiling and making small conversations with people you come across in your everyday life, with a neighbour, in a shop, at a bus stop or just while sitting on a bench in a park.
Some people find it helpful to be in an environment where there are lots of people, such as coffee shops, a library, shopping centres, and museums. Feeling the presence of others may help with some feelings of loneliness
If you have a daily routine, this may help to make new connections, as you may meet others who are on your daily journey, for example, I swim most mornings and see the same people at the swimming pool when I go and now pass the time of day with them when I see them.
If you like reading, think about going to a library or joining an online or in-person book club. Focus on being in surroundings where you feel safe and at ease.
As you grow more confident, volunteer at a charity shop, or a local hospice, there are many groups set up all over the country to help connect people.
The internet, social media and GP surgeries will all have the relevant information. I would highly recommend the Catty Café Scheme they do both online and in-person meetings, both one-to-one and group, and their work in this space is genuine, caring and brilliant.
Finally, please remember that you never have to be alone. There are many organisations out there to help support and guide you. find the courage and strength to find them, and when you do, you will be pleased that you have.
For more information visit lynncrilly.com