A B.C. woman successfully challenged a will that left over 80 per cent of her mother’s wealth to her brother, saying he received preferential treatment as the only son.
A B.C. Supreme Court judge found that family assets weren’t evenly distributed after the death of Yat Hei Law, the mother of Ginny Lam and William Law. Under the will, about $2.9 million was left to the son, $170,000 to daughter,
“Ginny and William’s mother held a gender-based bias that resulted in William receiving most of his mother’s assets,” Justice Maria Morellato wrote in her decision.
“This bias influenced and shaped the disposition of the mother’s assets, not only through the gifts she gave Ginny and William during her lifetime, but was also reflected in her 2018 will,” Morellato wrote.
A court can vary a will if a will-maker doesn’t adequately provide for a spouse or children, according to B.C.’s Wills, Estates and Succession Act.
Ginny Lam, who challenged her mother’s will in court, argued her mother’s decision was based on outdated gender values from 1960s village culture in China.
“My mom truly believed that my brother was the king and the cat’s meow,” Lam told Postmedia. “She truly embodied that sons and boys were put on a pedestal.”
Lam, who was born in Vancouver, said her parents were “your traditional new immigrants” when they moved to B.C. in 1969. “My father owned a Chinese restaurant and he was very forward thinking, very entrepreneurial.”
In 1992, Lam’s father won $1 million in the BC/49 lottery. He sold the restaurant and purchased three rental properties.
After her father died, over time, more and more of those assets were given to her brother.
“She told me pretty much throughout my life that my brother was going to inherit everything,” Lam said. “She told me to my face that ’He’s a son, he’s going to inherit everything.’ And I was angry with her.”
In court filings, Lam provided evidence of the many ways her mother offered preferential treatment to her brother throughout childhood, in ways big and small.
Her mother made her park on the street so her brother could use the garage. He was given the best pieces of meat and fish at meals. Once Lam’s mother told her she “should not be so smart or successful, and that girls should get a regular job so that they can bear sons and take care of their families,” Morellato wrote.
“I know a lot of the new Chinese people that are coming don’t adopt these traditional values that say that sons are better than daughters,” Lam said.
Even still, she said many women have reached out with similar experiences, talking about mothers “giving everything” to their sons at the expense of their daughters.
“I need to get this out there so that more women don’t feel like me, where I felt like I was ashamed, I was on my own, that I had no choice but to follow my mom,” Lam said. “I was torn between my family heritage and growing up being a Canadian citizen and not wanting to bring shame to the family.”
“We were not allowed to talk about this in the family, and I’m pretty sure it’s very common in other families, too,” Lam said. “You don’t talk about money. You’re not allowed to talk about feelings.”
She said she hoped her story would help women in similar situations to feel empowered to speak up and seek advice.
“The hand they get dealt does not have to be their story,” Lam said.
With a file from Susan Lazaruk.